The annual fuel economy report of Gerard Manley Hopkins.
I’m more than a week late to this, but I finally watched Hurt Feelings by Flight of the Conchords. Wow, what a roller coaster ride of emotions. As usual, their flow is impeccable. More impeccable than in their legendary track Hiphopopotamus vs. Rhymenoceros? Well, I wouldn’t go that far. In any event, here are the lyrics to Hurt Feelings: (more…)
A massively overlooked milestone here at Hartnett HQ: The Hiphopopotamus vs. Rhymenoceros lyrics post turned 1 last Sunday. That stupid thing attracted 13,147 page views in its first year, 24.8 percent of all traffic across the entire site during the same period. Slightly more than 94 percent of visits to the post arrived via Google. Where would I be without Flight of the Conchords? Watch the HBO version video by mashing your mouse right here.
Here’s the NBC Nightly News segment shot last week at The Palm Beach Post and broadcast Tuesday night. Included here at Matt’s suggestion. Probably not coincidentally, he’s in the background between 1:31 and 1:34 while The Post’s VP of digital is talking.
I’m a latecomer to The Wire, having caught on only at the start of the current season. Though even I find the newsroom storyline snooze-worthy, I’m still happy to feature in this week’s Paper View Monday The Baltimore Sun, as seen in Virtual Earth/Live Maps. Say, speaking of The Sun, this CJR story about The Wire says its newsroom was down to about 300 people before the most recent cutbacks were announced. For real? My own employer, no joke, has roughly 300 newsroom positions, not including our Spanish-language weekly. Well, who’s the “big” paper now?
Via Cheezburger comes this amazing piece of indescribable awesomeness. As one YouTube commenter pointed out, it looks better than season six.
Well, not so much this year as this Saturday. Florida vs. Florida State in Gainesville at 5 p.m. Battlestar Galactica: Razor at 9 p.m. Bonus metaphysical conundrum: Who/what would prevail in a confrontation, Tim Tebow or Battlestar Pegasus?
As a Florida alum and fan of Gators athletics I watch a lot of SEC football on CBS, which means I get a pretty big dose of Verne Lundquist and Gary Danielson each fall. I’ve long thought Danielson’s broadcasting style is idiosyncratic, a bit like Dan Rather’s election-night “Ratherisms.” (“This race is hotter than the Devil’s anvil.”) But his performance during Saturday’s Florida-Georgia game really has me worried. Consider this analysis of Florida quarterback Tim Tebow’s shoulder injury:
“When you cut yourself shaving, it’s gonna bleed for a week. When you hurt your shoulder like Tim Tebow did, it’s gonna hurt for a week.”
WTF, Gary Danielson?
He also insisted on several occasions that “This is still a football game,” lest the viewer mistakenly conclude that, after two and a half hours of football, the teams were now engaged in a cricket match. And he once referred to Georgia quarterback Matthew Stafford as Mike Bobo, who last played for the Bulldogs a decade ago. Perhaps most perplexing was his mangling of the fable of the scorpion and the frog, which, apart from being creatively reinterpreted to involve a scorpion and a tortoise, was inexplicably employed to illustrate an indecipherable point about Tebow’s tendency to run the ball.
Gary, seriously, have your brain checked out first thing Monday morning.
But only because I don’t have any video my own angry dance, which is just a lot more lyrical than this.
Loook ouuut, he is a spider pig. Simpsons movie: Brilliant.
Spiderpig lyrics:Spiderpig, Spiderpig
does whatever a Spiderpig does
can he swing, from a web?
no he can’t, he’s a pig
look out, he is a Spiderpig
I see from the keyword referrals that some folks are winding up at my original Hiphopopotamus vs. Rhymenoceros video post while searching for the lyrics to this amazingly brilliant, gritty urban rap by Flight of the Conchords. These lyrics are specifically from the version featured on the HBO show. And while you’re here, have a look at the lyrics from FOTC’s other sweet rap tune Hurt Feelings.
I’m the mother flippin’ Rhymenocerous
My beats are phat and the birds are on my back
And I’m horny
I’m horny
If you choose to proceed you will indeed concede
Cos I hit you with my flow
The Wild Rhino Stampede.
I’m not just wild, I’m trained,
Domesticated
I was raised by a rapper and rhino that dated
And subsequently procreated
That’s how it goes
Here’s the Hiphopopotamus
The hip hop hippo
They call me the Hiphopopotamus
My lyrics are bottomless
They call me the Hiphopopotamus
Flows that glow like phosphorous
Poppin’ off the top of this esophagus
Rockin’ this metropolis
I’m not a large water-dwelling mammal
Where did you get that preposterous hypothesis?
Did Steve tell you that, perchance?
Steve.
My rhymes and records they don’t get played
Because my records and rhymes they don’t get made
And if you rap like me you don’t get paid
And if you roll like me you don’t get laid.
My rhymes are so potent that in this small segment
I made all of the ladies in the area pregnant
Yes, sometimes my lyrics are sexist
But you lovely bitches and hoes should know I’m trying to correct this.
Other rappers dis me
Say my rhymes are sissy.
Why? Why? Why?
What?
Why exactly?
What? Why?
Be more constructive with your feedback, please. Why?
Why?
Why, because I rap about reality?
Like me and my grandma drinking a cup of tea?
There ain’t no party like my nanna’s tea party.
Hey! Ho!
I’m the motherflippin’
I’m the motherflippin’
I’m the motherflippin’
Who’s the motherflippin?
I’m the motherflippin’
I’m the motherflippin’
I’m the motherflippin’
Motherflippin’