The bad news, Paper View Monday fans, is that the free ride is over. Buffeted by the same buffety winds that have buffeted so many enterprises across the buffeted media landscape, Paper View Monday will be a strictly fee-based feature from this week forward.

The good news is that we have devised a micropayment system that is so elegant you won’t even mind paying for something of little obvious value that you have for several years now enjoyed for free. So before you you view this week’s newspaper building as seen in Bing Maps, which happens to be The Pueblo Chieftain of Pueblo, Colorado, please send me one Martin Van Buren dollar coin using the method described below.

Connect with me via Google Wave, where you must plead a compelling case as to why I should approve your request to follow me on Twitter. Submit Twitter follow request. If the case you have presented via Google Wave is deemed sufficient and your request is approved, send me a single direct message outlining the reasons why we should become Facebook friends. If your Facebook friend request is approved, send a message via Facebook in which you guess my favorite instant-messaging service, client and username. If you correctly name two out of the three, or can answer any single question and argue an even moderately compelling case for why the stupendously boring film The Dark Knight actually deserved more than, say, 90 of its 152 unbelievably idiotic minutes of running time, you will be allowed to communicate with me via chat. Initiate a chat session to receive a Hotmail address to which you must email a request for my fax number. When you are in possession of the fax number, fax a request for my mobile phone number. Call my mobile phone and leave me a voicemail with your physical mailing address. I will mail you a letter containing my mailing address, to which you must then mail one Martin Van Buren dollar coin for each occasion on which you view this and all subsequent Paper View Monday installments.

Easy.

And in Google Maps Street View:

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