As a Florida alum and fan of Gators athletics I watch a lot of SEC football on CBS, which means I get a pretty big dose of Verne Lundquist and Gary Danielson each fall. I’ve long thought Danielson’s broadcasting style is idiosyncratic, a bit like Dan Rather’s election-night “Ratherisms.” (”This race is hotter than the Devil’s anvil.”) But his performance during Saturday’s Florida-Georgia game really has me worried. Consider this analysis of Florida quarterback Tim Tebow’s shoulder injury:

“When you cut yourself shaving, it’s gonna bleed for a week. When you hurt your shoulder like Tim Tebow did, it’s gonna hurt for a week.”

WTF, Gary Danielson?

He also insisted on several occasions that “This is still a football game,” lest the viewer mistakenly conclude that, after two and a half hours of football, the teams were now engaged in a cricket match. And he once referred to Georgia quarterback Matthew Stafford as Mike Bobo, who last played for the Bulldogs a decade ago. Perhaps most perplexing was his mangling of the fable of the scorpion and the frog, which, apart from being creatively reinterpreted to involve a scorpion and a tortoise, was inexplicably employed to illustrate an indecipherable point about Tebow’s tendency to run the ball.

Gary, seriously, have your brain checked out first thing Monday morning.