It figures that Desktop Tower Defense would be upgraded less than a week before we move into the new house. I have loads of packing left yet, but all I want to do now is figure out whether the new Ink Tower is worth messing around with. (No, apparently.)

My instant evaluation: The new Dark Creeps seem particularly susceptible to Bash Towers, the Morph Creeps are a complete pain and the Boost Tower is an intriguing development that I plan to incorporate into the standard strategy I developed in the previous version of the game. (I tend to go for a straight-up maze. The juggling thing just seems so boring.) Otherwise, I haven’t fully explored the new features.

Don’t have a clue what I’m talking about? For real, though? Do you even have a license for that Internet connection? Listen, do yourself a favor and play Dekstop Tower Defense immediately. It’s at least 50 percent more entertaining than anything currently available for the PS3, and it won’t set you back $600. Before long, you too will be squandering precious hours of your life in front of the computer screen, as opposed to, you know, going outside, exposing yourself to sunlight and interacting with other humans.