Florida keeps rolling along, Carolina and Georgetown came through for me, and my Sweet Sixteen record is 4-4. My bracket is hardly what you would call in great shape, but three of my four Final Four picks are still alive, so there you are.

With people of The Nature Boy’s stature backing Florida, I don’t see much chance of Oregon knocking them off. Oregon, after all, is one of only two states in which drivers are not allowed to pump their own gas. If that’s not a clear sign of a backward thinking and general mental deficiency, I don’t know what is.

My lone Oregon gas station story: The dirty twenty-something high school dropout pumping gas into my rental car, upon learning where I was from, volunteered that he had heard that “Florida is not a very good place to live.” That I did not immediately put the little shit’s stupid dreadlocked head through the rear windshield of my Chevy Cavalier showed what I believe to be a saintly amount of restraint.

And my Oregon media digression: While checking out The Oregonian for the local view of the Duck’s impending loss to Florida, I was reminded of how bland all the cookie-cutter Advance Internet newspaper sites are. We can make a fun little game out of their blandness, in fact. Open each of the following ten pages in a separate tab and, without looking at the logo in the upper left corner, name which city or state the site alleges to cover: One two three four five six seven eight nine ten.