The annual fuel economy report of Gerard Manley Hopkins.
As if featuring one of our cats on its home page wasn’t enough, The Post is using a picture of our other one this morning. As I’ve said before, I’m absolutely mental about this sort of thing. Don’t forget to check out the rest of the pictures.
>For Fox’s Rivals, ‘American Idol’ Remains a ‘Schoolyard Bully’ (NYT)
Believe me when I say that I am far from being a TV snob. As evidence, consider my honest, slack-jawed conviction that Hell’s Kitchen was appointment television. Given such appalling viewing habits, how is it that I’ve never watched more than five minutes of America Idol, much less an entire episode or season? I feel like this is my fault, what with the show now averaging 33.5 million viewers and all. Is there a treatment for my problem, a drug I can take, counseling I can seek? I’ve even tried reading about the show, but I’m still not watching.
>Canadian Company Offers Nude Photos via Cellphone (NYT)
WTF? People are buying soft-core porn — sorry, “sex-related content” — over their cell phones for $2.60?! Is this a Canadian thing? Meanwhile, in Connecticut …
>Teacher Faces Jail Over Pornography on Class Computer (NYT)
(Via Pogue)
… a substitute teacher faces up to 40 years in prison after being convicted of four counts something called, bizarrely, “risking injury to a child.” This, because some kiddies saw a few racy pop-up ads. Gaa, the stupidity!
>Chelsea cut their losses down to £80m (The Guardian)
English Premier League side Chelsea have CUT their losses to £80 million in the most recent financial year, which, based on current exchange rates, is roughly $971 billion. According to The Guardian story linked above, owner Roman Abramovich has sunk over £500 million into the club in three years, which, again based on my rough calculations, is $279 trillion. Get this man an American newspaper chain immediately!
(I’m fully aware that Chelsea the Clinton, at right, has nothing to do with Chelsea the football club, but it was either her or the 1970 F.A. Cup-winning squad. Not the liveliest bunch of lads, though I do find their sideburns ample and prosperous-looking.)
As previously stated, my wife and I, which is to say I alone without her knowledge or involvement, am unhealthily dedicated to the dissemination of pictures of our cats. Well, as you can see above, my employer is unwittingly getting into the act. Pokeweed is going viral, son! If you’re inclined to indulge my cat-photo insanity, do consider mashing your mouse on the following:
The Pokeweed & Belle gallery on PostPix, my employer’s photo-sharing site. As I write this, the gallery has tallied 1,730 views. Let’s see if, based on the amount of traffic I know this site to be capable of driving, we can get that figure up to 1,735!
My Flickr set of the very same pictures contained in the gallery above. Clicking your way over to a different gallery on a different site to view the same pictures might seem daft, but that’s only because it absolutely is.
Yet another picture contained in both of the galleries above, but this time featured on Stuff On My Cat. (Please know that I did not write any of the comments posted to that site, most especially not the one in which the gentle squeezing of my cat’s feet is advocated. I have a long track record of opposing the squeezing of cat feet, gentle or otherwise.) Even other cats recognize this as the finest picture ever displayed on SOMC.
>Horror Movie at High Pitch in TV Ad Aimed at Teenagers (NYT)
“If you can’t hear the advertising, then maybe the movie isn’t for you. That was the implicit message in a television commercial for ‘The Messengers,’ a horror film from Sony’s Screen Gems division that opened on Feb. 2. In addition to the usual ominous music, slow-motion images and deep-voiced narration, the commercial featured a high-pitched noise that most adults are unable to hear.”
Pffft, like this is cutting edge marketing. Newspapers have been doing the opposite for decades: Producing news and information that’s completely invisible to people under the age of 40.
>History Offers Hope and Fear for Kodak (NYT)
Newspaper: “Eastman Kodak is an industrial giant of the 20th century that has been cut down to size in the 21st by its failure to keep up with developments in technology and the demands of the marketplace.” Indeed.
The Buffalo News delivers the story of Charlie the Karate Chimp’s cameo in the movie Ghost Rider. Charlie — What the hell is AP style for chimpanzee names on second reference? — has been featured in a handful of well-circulated videos. Left unresolved by the story is whether these clips are of greater cinematic value than Ghost Rider, which I’m just assuming is totally unwatchable.
Elsewhere, there’s a baffling discussion about the laboratory creation of a human-chimp hybrid, and the implications thereof on the creationism vs. evolutionary science debate. At no point in the thread is the ludicrous premise questioned. There is so much happening the world that I know nothing about.
